Beautiful, beautiful sunshine!!! The kids spent hours playing in the back yard pool.

Whitney at the ER in Wenatchee after breaking her nose. She wasn't thrilled that I took this picture, but I figure once everything is all said and done, we'll look back on this and have a great laugh! Just not yet :-).

Whitney & her friend Paige sounding very confident before Whitney got her nose broke 7 hours later :-).

June 16, 2008

Is it really the middle of June already? Today is the last day of school for Spencer and tomorrow the girls will finish up their last day. As the kids breath a sigh of relief that end is finally here, I can't help but look back and reflect how much our entire family has grown and changed. On the one hand its exciting to see Sydney and Spencer gaining confidence in so many areas of their life, enjoying new friendships, and feeling like they just can't grow up quick enough. On the other side, I see how quickly it all goes by as Whitney prepares for her sophomore year. I can't stop time or slow it down. I certainly wouldn't want to for her sake. She is also gaining more confidence and self-assurance. My evenings are filled with reading books about teenagers and how to do the best job I can as her mother to prepare her for a world that is much different than the one I left high school for. There's constantly this mental check list going on in my mind of what wisdom, what information, what skills still need to be imparted that aren't there yet. The only thing that brings me great peace is that I know God has her in the palm of his hand. I know also that she has her own relationship with Him that she will be able to draw upon as time goes by. The relationship has slowly been evolving these last couple years. And, while I enjoy encouraging her to spread her wings and follow her hearts desire, I know that I have my own wings to attend to.

Next year will be the first year that all three of my kids will be in school all day at the same time. It has been 15 years since I last had my days free. It opens up so many possibilities and also a lot of reflection. Will I be well enough to do the things that God laid upon my heart years ago? Do those things apply now, or has God given me a new heart with a different purpose than I once thought? I don't know, but its time to begin to open up some of those old doors that I closed so tightly to first and foremost be the mom I had always dreamed of being. To give my kids those things I didn't have and to instill a new heritage that would allow them to be emotionally and spiritually healthy people. To watch Whitney making her way through high school and having so much fun, being a positive influence on those around her reassures me that everything I thought I was giving up to solely focus on parenting was more than worth it. To hear Sydney and Spencer share their own version of life and how vigorously they embrace it makes all other dreams pale in comparison.

We traveled to Wenatchee this weekend for one of Whitney's tournaments and the first night was so crazy trying to figure out where everyone was going to sleep. Sydney and Spencer just melted down on us because they wanted to sleep downstairs with Whitney and her friend. I felt like I would never bring them on another trip again. But, after realizing how sleep deprived and over stimulated they were from more sun than we know how to handle and lots of swimming...things finally started to fall into place. Smiles were abounding, and we had all settled into having fun again. Whitney was playing three games on Saturday and two on Sunday. On the third game which started at 7 p.m., towards the end, a girl that Whitney was guarding threw her elbow right across the bridge of Whitney's nose. I could hear this loud crack noise and realized that blood was going to soon be spewing out. Sure enough, the drama began. After about 20 minutes of trying to get the bleeding to stop, we were able to get her up to the ER and have someone take a look at it. He confirmed what we thought and sent us on our way. So, yesterday Whitney was not able to play. But, she showed up and cheered her team on. I was so proud of her for being willing to sit on the bench and encourage the rest of the girls even though her nose was swelling by the minute from all of that heat and extra cheering she was doing.

On the drive home we stopped in Leavenworth and got ice cream at the Cold Stone with another mom and daughter, then finally rolled in around 6 p.m. last night. It was definitely an exciting journey, but once again, I realized that even through it all we managed to stick together, have fun and just be grateful for the time together. Maybe with me being sick these last couple years we all just realize how quickly life can change and how fragile it can be. When I drove to Wenatchee last year, just the drive alone wiped me out and I had to spend a couple hours in bed just to recover. This year I was able to do all the basic stuff and didn't really have time to take a nap. I did pay for it later, but the fact was I was able to do it. We all talked about how different things are now that I'm better and how grateful we are for God's healing power in my life. My kids have learned a lot, they continue to teach me a lot and I still have so much more to learn. Its never ending.

If there is one thing I feel God has instilled in me through everything, its the ability to see the bigger picture. I wasn't always that way which probably lead to such a lack of patience on my part. But, being able to see how every opportunity today with my kids will benefit them 20 years from now raising their own families, makes every trip to the doctor's office, every fever in the middle of the night, every toe-to-toe match with my son :-), and every quiet moment with my girls talking and giggling, so worth it...It will be gone far too quickly!

God is good!
Blessings, Tanya

June 6, 2008

I'm so thankful that God has allowed me to be well enough during this season of the lives of my kids. I don't know how we would be managing things if I were still in bed and unable to drive. It's an exciting time at Casa De Gore, but incredibly busy. The life of a teenager still dominates most of our time, but to be honest you won't hear us complain very much. We are enjoying seeing Whitney blossom in so many areas of her life. And, she has been a great example to Sydney and Spencer. It's a joy to hear them being excited about following in her foot steps.

I think gone are the days of us planning a leisurely summer with trips here and there. Right now our schedule totally rotates around Whitney's summer basketball schedule. Her new high school team has formed for the month of June. So, she has been playing in tournaments nearly every weekend. It's exciting for us to be a part of a new high school program and lay down a strong support base for this school. There is so much pride already in making this process a positive one and to lay a strong foundation down for those that follow behind.

Whitney seems to be moving towards being on Varsity, although she would be fine with JV. She just loves to play, so her motto is just put her anywhere she can run up and down the court. I love that about her. No muss - No fuss!!! But, she has really improved since Winter and she has been playing on a separate league this Spring (while playing golf...yeesh) with girls that are older than her. We think this experience has given her some good confidence for moving up this next season. This weekend she will be playing in a tournament at Meadowdale High School with the Varsity squad, and next weekend it will be off to Wenatchee. At the end of June she will rejoin her Select team and travel to Oregon City. The next weekend will be in Seattle, and then a short break so that we can take our vacation to Spokane/Idaho. We get back on a Sunday from Idaho (12 hour drive) and she turns around and heads back to Spokane again for a four day tournament over there. I think that will be her last one...we pray.

Somewhere amongst all this craziness there will be three birthdays stuffed in to the mix, Sydney and Spencer's summer camps, driving school for Whitney and hopefully a few rounds of golf. It all sounds good in theory but I feel tired already :-). I guess it will be a good kind of tired.

I recently went to see one of my naturpathic doctors and she has been helping me sort out my hormone confusion. I'm taking thyroid, adrenal and progesterone hormone creams and sometimes I can really feel out of sorts. So, I'm still trying to get that dialed in. She also started me on a supplement that is used to heal the intestinal system and we are hoping that it will help me be able to tolerate more foods. We'll see. The good news is that I've been able to tolerate the new supplement and for me that 99% of the battle. Any good that comes out of it is just the gravy :-). God just continues to give me guidance and healing one step at a time. It is true that when we ask things according to His will...He does answer us. I'm awe struck at the times I just feel so stuck in this process and as I wait patiently and have faith that the answer will come, it eventually does. But, when I get impatient and try to figure everything out on my own, that's when I notice things get difficult.

I can say for the first time in over three years that I am actually looking forward to this summer. I know that I will be able to get some sunshine, spend quality time with my family and enjoy a break from the regular winter schedule. I feel so incredibly blessed by my family and even though these years have been painfully difficult, to see how we stayed together through it all means more to me than anything. We certainly aren't perfect and have our "moments" but I love how the Lord has knit us together just as He does when we are in our mother's womb. It's just amazing grace that has been poured out to us and we realize it and are so grateful.

God is good!
Blessings, Tanya